Showing posts with label food. Show all posts
Showing posts with label food. Show all posts

Thursday, April 24, 2014

Toothpick tripod: microwaving butter without melting it

toothpick tripod method butter microwave without melting puddling Josef Spalenka
The Toothpick Tripod Method of Microwaving Butter

Have you ever wondered how to soften butter in the microwave without it melting?

Softening refrigerated butter in a microwave to make it instantly spreadable has been a challenge to humanity for more than half a century. The inherent difficulty of microwaving butter is so well known that it was recently illustrated in a popular webcomic by The Oatmeal. Microwaving butter resting directly on a plate results in partial melting and puddling. Additionally, the time window between spreadably soft butter and mostly liquid butter is very narrow, and is highly variable depending on the microwave oven used, the size of the butter pat, and the material composition of the plate.

I am pleased to announce that this butter softening challenge has finally been solved.

I recently noticed that the initial puddling phenomenon always starts at the bottom of the butter pat where it contacts the plate, but the plate itself does not necessarily get hot and cause the melting. Even starting with a refrigerated plate results in melting from the bottom of the butter pat first. My idea was to elevate the butter pat above the plate, using toothpicks as shown in the above image, to avoid contact with the plate and hopefully achieve even heating without melting. I call this "The Toothpick Tripod Method" of microwave butter softening.

A tripod was chosen because it is the most efficient method to form a stable elevated support, with minimal surface area contact to the butter, and it is suitable for a butter pat of any shape. A bonus byproduct of this method, is that it also solves the problem of variable heating between different microwave ovens. Using the toothpick tripod method, you can simply set the microwave for any sufficiently long length of time, and then carefully watch the microwave until the buttery tripod softens and falls down under its own weight. The result is perfectly spreadable butter with no melted liquid, every time.

Try it for yourself!

Friday, February 21, 2014

Paddle Your Own Canoe



Yesterday I started listening to the Audiobook Paddle Your Own Canoe, "One Man's Fundamentals for Delicious Living." It is both written and narrated by Nick Offerman, best known on television as Ron Swanson from Parks and Recreation. It's because of works like these that audiobooks are a valuable format and can sometimes surpass the experience of reading the book they are based on. There is something really special about an audiobook that is read by its own author, when it's done really, really well. And Offerman surely does it well. The only other author I can think of who can regularly pull off this feat is Neil Gaiman.

I don't have any more cogent thoughts than that for now. Perhaps once I've finished the audiobook, I will update this stubby article with some important thoughts about the philosophy of eating barbecued red meat and how to make your own way as a nonconformist man in modern America.

Sunday, February 9, 2014

End the War Against Preserved and Processed Foods!

As I was reminded by a recent article about the historical trajectory of orange juice in America's food supply, I am continually baffled by the war being waged against food "processing" and food "preservatives." If it can be shown that there are no adverse health consequences, and the product tastes rather good and people like to buy it, and it's much cheaper than "fresh and unprocessed" food, then why demonize a product for lasting a long time on the shelf or for being "overly processed"?

Some heroic highly processed and overly preserved foods

This "processing and preservatives" talk is always conflated with the problem of "the product contains too much sugar," or "the product contains too little nutritional value," which I definitely understand and sympathize with. I get it that orange juice naturally contains lots of sugar, regardless of the date and location the fruits were harvested, or whether aromatic citrus oils were added back into the juice to improve the flavor after a long storage time. I get it that Twinkies contain little in the way of nutritional value for growing children. But will the self-appointed food police concede that many foods can have a very long shelf life, be highly processed with many artificial industrial-scale steps, and yet still contain lots of nutrients and not very much sugar? How about a can of tomato paste that was processed in a factory and "boiled to death," or canned tuna "which has been patiently sitting in storage sometimes for more than a year"? Boiling food to death, putting it in air-tight cans or jars, and eating it over a year after it was harvested from the field or the orchard or the ocean is a supremely amazing achievement of human ingenuity. People ought to be tickled with joy each time they drink a glass of pretty-decently-tasting orange juice, in Chicago or Denver or Boston during a frigid February morning, for just the price of a few measly quarters. Instead they grumble and look out their window at the snowy landscape, and wonder why they aren't instead treated to the sweet nectar of a freshly hand-plucked and hand-squeezed fruit.

Some people complain that "processed foods" are chock full of high-fructose corn syrup and other ingredients that they would like to avoid. However, the presence of high-fructose corn syrup in food has little to do with the number of processing steps required to make the product at a large cost-effective scale, or the desire to preserve and store food for a long time. Instead, corn syrup is put into foods because it is much cheaper than alternative sweeteners such as cane sugar, and people love inexpensive food. People crave sweetness because they are built by evolution to desire high-calorie sweetened foods, which were rare treats in prehistoric nature. No demonization of preservatives or demonization of complicated multi-step industrial processing need enter into this part of the food supply discussion.

Some people complain that they don't like processed or preserved foods because "they have no idea what's in it." I've got news for you, you probably have no idea what's in most of the things you ingest. Most people think of a "roasted coffee bean," for example, as a magical nature product provided by Mother Earth, rather than as a complex cocktail of chemicals in various proportions. Some of the natural chemical constituents of roasted coffee beans are toxic and carcinogenic (but they exist at very low harmless concentrations). If the scientific names of all the chemical components in your all-natural skinny hazelnut macchiato were listed on the back of the cup, they would make your head spin.

Highly preserved and industrially processed foods are simply amazing. They allow us to even out the food supply both geographically and seasonally, and provide low-cost sustenance to people who would have in ancient times suffered a lack of nutrition or even starvation. How quickly people forget that cheese, beer, and wine, those cornerstones of western food culture, were initially methods to "highly process and highly preserve" excess milk, grain, and grapes during bounteous times, in order to stockpile calories and nutrients for leaner times...even stockpile them for many years after the initial harvest. Why did ancient humans bother to invent these things? Why did humans bother to invent beef jerky, and bacon, and salami? It wasn't because some scary corporation thought it would be fun to feed children a bunch of "nitrates and nitrites."

Often, the alternative to eating a highly processed and highly preserved food, or the alternative to eating a food that has traveled hundreds of miles on a truck or on a boat, is to have no food at all. This has been the default situation for mankind for thousands of years, and a situation which has been all but forgotten by the snobbish foodies who complain that frozen concentrated orange juice doesn't taste quite as good as the fresh squeezed stuff picked that day from your very own backyard orchard. Now if you don't mind, before I go shovel the snow from my Chicago sidewalk, I'm going to go have a delicious glass of frozen concentrated orange juice and a mug of chemical cocktail coffee to wash down my Minnesota refined flour crepes spread with California processed cream cheese and a dollop of Montana huckleberry preserves.

Wednesday, January 29, 2014

The Seeker


The Seeker victorian air ship dirigible adobe illustrator by Josef Spalenka 2014

I wanted to practice my Adobe Illustrator skills, which is always incredibly useful for making vector graphics for slides and figures. To stretch my skills, I attempted to make a vector image based on a relatively complex piece of engraved art. It is from the label of a bottle of German Riesling wine that Danielle found at Woodman's Market. It took a long time to make all of the cables and rigging, and get shapes of all of the curves right with the pen tool!

And below is the original image from the wine bottle label. The above image was made by more or less artfully tracing this wine label in Illustrator. The wine was pretty good, but the label art was so cool!

The SEEKER Riesling Mosel Germany 2012 wine bottle label air ship victorian dirigible
The Seeker German Riesling wine bottle label

The Seeker airship clouds Victorian blue sky vector graphics Josef Spalenka
A new version of "The Seeker" with a more colorful sky.
(Edited April 24, 2014)




Saturday, November 3, 2012

La festa di cibi fritti

Questo pomeriggio, partecipiamo nel partito nona edizione di cibi fritti.  Tutto e di più sarà fritto e mangiato.  Quando la festa è finita, avremo mal di stomaco perché abbiamo mangiato troppo cibo fritto.  Wisconsin è famoso per la cagliate di formaggio fritto (foto qui sotto).


Molti altri alimenti diventano deliziosi quando sono fritti.  I biscotti Oreo fritti in pastella, in particolare, sono ottimi.  Si dovrebbe assaggiarli, se avete la possibilità!


Monday, October 29, 2012

La mia famiglia ci visita

Questo fine settimana, la mia famiglia ha visitato Madison.  Mio padre, la madre e il fratello volano a Madison ogni anno, per guardare una partita di football americano.  Quest'anno sarà l'anno ultimo, perché Danielle e io ci trasferiremo lontano da Wisconsin, probabilmente.  Credo che ho mangiato troppo cibo fritto e bevuto anche molte birre, mentre la mia famiglia era in città...ora, dovrei mangiare insalata e bere l'acqua solamente!

Ecco una fotografia della mia familia da Natale scorso:


Monday, October 15, 2012

una pentola di zuppa

Stasera, ho preparato una pentola di zuppa.  Ho cotto con burro le cipolle a dadini, il sedano tritato, e le carotte affettate.  Con le verdure ho mescolato brodo di pollo, spezie, acqua, riso, e carne tagliuzzato di tacchino.  Abbiamo mangiato la zuppa con pane e burro.  Ho bevuto un ginger ale con ghiaccio.  Per dolce, ho mangiato i biscotti con un piccolo bicchiere di latte.


Sunday, October 7, 2012

un piatto tipico di Cincinnati

Stasera, i nostri amici ci hanno invitato a cena.  Hanno servito "Cincinnati chili," un piatto tipico di Cincinnati.  È differente rispetto a chili "Tex-mex" o chili di ovest americano.  È non troppo piccante, senza fagioli, e servita su spaghetti.  La carne manzo è condito con cannella, cioccolato, e altre spezie miste.  Cipolla tritata, formaggio cheddar tagliuzzato, e pane all'aglio completano il piatto.  Questa era la prima volta a mangiare "Cincinnati chili."  È stato squisito!



Friday, October 5, 2012

Fa troppo freddo!

Nel nostro appartamento, fa troppo freddo!  Il locatore non ha acceso il fornace della casa.  È diventato così tanto freddo in casa, anche la gatta si sente fredda.  La gatta deve coccolare con noi per tenere in caldo.  Spero che presto il locatore accende il calore!  Dopo il lavoro, quando torno a casa, mi berrò una tazza di cioccolata caldo (forse con piccante peperoncino in polvere?) o una tazza di tè alla cannella.




-- Josef Spalenka



Monday, September 24, 2012

due matrimoni dell'Illinois

Questa fine settimana, siamo andati a due matrimoni dell'Illinois.  Una matrimonio è accaduto a Springfield, e l'altro è accaduto a Chicago ovest.  Il primo matrimonio è stato in una chiesa luterana.  Il secondo matrimonio è stato in un campo da golf.  Al primo matrimonio, hanno servito carne di manzo (era freddo, purtroppo).  Per dolce, hanno servito torta di limone.  Al secondo matrimonio, hanno servito pollo con uvetta e purè di patate.  Per dolce, hanno servito torte della tazza.  I due matrimoni erano divertenti, ma ora siamo molto stanchi!

--Josef--


Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Pranzo scientifico

Oggi, ho pranzato con un professore di chimica e cinque studenti.  Il professore viene dalla Università del Colorado.  Abbiamo parlato di strati sottili dalla deposizione strato atomico (ALD).  Era discussione molto interessante.  Inoltre, il cibo assaggiato molto buono.  Ho mangiato un panino con carne di manzo, formaggio fuso, cipolle grigliate e aioli rafano.  Pranzo era buono, ma troppo costoso!

--Josef--

Sunday, September 9, 2012

Un viaggio di alimentari

Oggi, io devo andare alimentarei. Ecco lista di mangiare io devo comprare:

- Insalata
- Pomodori (Joe non piacciono i pomodori)
- Lamponi
- Banane
- Pane
- Carote
- Funghi
- Cipolla
- Spinache
- Latte
- Crema di caffè
- Formaggio
- Birra (con zucca!)

Che è, spero!

-- Danielle --